Within Obsession And Lies
Stories similar to this that you might like too.
Amber was waiting for me at the top of the steps when I came out. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail and she wore her favorite black tank top, which exposed plenty of cleavage to my hungry gaze. The way she looked right now always had the power to undo all the restraint I’d been practicing lately on the dance floor.
It didn’t matter that I knew it wouldn’t happen tonight or even over this long weekend. She made me feel like a teenager again and I wanted nothing more than to take her upstairs and make love until we could no longer stand up.
But I hadn’t come here to do anything but get drunk, have a good time with friends, and maybe hook up once in a while if Amber felt so inclined. Not because I wanted to hurt her or cheat on her with another girl, but simply because I wasn’t interested enough in her to commit myself fully to being exclusive. My relationship history certainly showed that such things were impossible for me to sustain.
“Hey,” I said as I approached her. “You look great.”
She gave an awkward half-smile. “Thanks.”
I reached down and tugged at the hem of her shirt until she lifted it easily to reveal her stomach where she’d tattooed some kind of flower design. I liked the way the thin gold chain around her neck glinted against it. “What’s that?” I asked as I traced it with my fingertip.
“The flower is part of my birth-month design. Every month is something different.”
“And what do you have tattooed on your back?”
She shivered a little beneath my touch. “It changes depending on how old I am. Right now it says ‘blessing’.”
“That sounds beautiful. What does it mean?”
Her eyes went distant for just a moment. She turned away from me and walked toward the house without answering.
When I caught up with her in front of the living room fireplace, she put her fingers gently across my lips before turning to face me. “Nothing.” She paused and then added, “Well, actually it means that God has blessed me beyond measure since I found the courage to walk away from everything I’ve known to be true about who I am. And he continues to do so every day.”
I nodded. “Does everyone in your life know your birthday?”
She shrugged. “Some do. Some don’t.”
She didn’t want to talk anymore. So I let go of her hand and followed her into the dining area. A couple guys from school were there with their girlfriends, but neither was Amber. They were watching a movie on TV while the girls played Uno by candlelight on the table.
As far as I was concerned, they could play cards all night and I wouldn’t care, but apparently, I wasn’t included. I sat down on one side of the couch and Amber took the other. She curled up close to my body as she leaned forward against the armrest, leaving me trapped between her and the hard edge of the cushions. I tried not to think too much about why, because the answer was obvious.
“What’s your sign, Libra?” one of the guys sitting next to me asked.
I glanced over his shoulder to see who else might be around us and saw a girl wearing one of those tight little outfits that seemed to show off every curve to its fullest potential. Amber didn’t seem happy with her choice of clothing either, because she gave me a sharp sideways glance and then shook her head as if in disgust.
Then she turned her attention back to the television where the guy she’d come with spoke to the actor who played a vampire in the movie. He wasn’t very convincing looking, but she was fascinated by him nonetheless.
The doorbell rang and I got up to answer it. When I returned, I brought a tray loaded with drinks and bowls of popcorn. One bowl was filled with nuts, another had cheese crackers, and the last one held a few pieces of chocolate-covered pretzels.
There was no conversation among anyone except the actors and actresses on the screen and the girl whose boyfriend I’d brought home. Everyone else was lost in their own separate worlds, but Amber and I were content to sit together and watch the movie from our vantage points.
I had to admit that seeing her leaning against me was more comforting than it should have been when we weren’t dating. But I didn’t regret coming here tonight. We were two people out having fun for no reason other than it pleased us to be together. That was exactly what I needed after spending most of the past week feeling so depressed over Rachel’s rejection.
As the movie finally ended, Amber stood up and stretched. Her body moved perfectly under the tight cotton of her shirt, drawing my attention to the small bump of flesh on her belly and the fullness of her breasts. It was only natural for me to lean forward a bit, but she pushed me back just enough that I didn’t make contact.
The corners of her mouth curved upward, but then her expression went serious again. She looked down at me and her voice came low and soft like velvet in the darkness. “We’re supposed to go out tomorrow night with everyone from school.”
My stomach twisted and I felt dizzy, but I forced myself to speak in an even tone, hoping it would keep my reaction under control. “Okay,” I said. “Is something wrong? Is this because Rachel isn’t going to be there?”
Amber shook her head. “No, not really. Just…I thought you might want to hang out with her instead of me.”
My blood rushed to my cheeks and I struggled to catch my breath, trying to think clearly. This was exactly the problem that Rachel had talked about: Amber never wanted to be anywhere near Rachel and it made me sick whenever I realized how often they avoided each other in public.
And now that Amber was trying to tell me not to worry about them being friends because they weren’t, well, it pissed me off. How dare she pretend that Rachel didn’t mean anything to her?
“It’s okay, Amber, don’t worry about it.”
She shook her head slowly and then smiled faintly. “This is a test, isn’t it?”
“A test of what?”
She stepped closer to me. “Are we still friends?”
I frowned. “Sure. Why wouldn’t we be?”
“Rachel says you don’t like her. You always look away or laugh at things she’s talking about. She doesn’t understand why you two aren’t dating yet. She thinks you should be together.”
I sighed. “That’s none of your business, Amber.”
But the words fell flat in the silence as I looked into her eyes. No matter how many times I told myself that this wouldn’t hurt any more than it already did, it was impossible not to remember that first sight of her in a dress made for another.
My heart still raced at the memory. Amber had been a vision of beauty in all white, standing next to Rachel who’d been dressed in black silk. They had been so close together that it had seemed inevitable that they would fall in love.
And that had driven me crazy because nothing was more important to me than being in a relationship with Rachel. It had almost destroyed me knowing that Amber was in her arms, whispering sweet nothings into her ear.
And Rachel hadn’t noticed a damn thing. If Amber had tried to kiss me that day, I would have kissed her right back. But Rachel had ignored everything that happened between us and had gone home to Amber and her parents while I drove around town wondering what I could possibly do to win her back. Now she had a new boyfriend whom she apparently loved more than I ever would.
“You’re angry with me,” Amber whispered.
Her voice was barely audible over the television, but I heard it and knew she wasn’t lying. The question was why. Was she jealous because Rachel had moved on before she even gave us a chance? Or did she just find it hard to believe that a guy who’d dated her best friend for three years could suddenly turn his affection to me?
Either way, she didn’t sound convinced. As long as the possibility existed that Rachel was still alive inside Amber somewhere, I couldn’t let her forget that we’d shared something special once upon a time.
I reached forward and touched her arm gently, letting the tips of my fingers brush across the fabric of her sleeve. “Look,” I began, feeling nervous despite my desire to be honest, “I’m sorry if it seems like I’ve forgotten about you. We were pretty close at one point and—”
“I know that.”
“Then—”
“Don’t try and explain yourself to me, Alex. There’s no point. I understand.”
For some reason, those simple words pierced me deeply. I pulled away and then stood up and headed for the door. Before I could reach it, though, Amber grabbed my arm and stopped me.
“Alex.” Her voice trembled and I turned back to see tears glistening in her eyes. “If there’s something else, then talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong.”
She was so sincere, I found myself hesitating. “What are you doing here? I don’t get to see Rachel very much anymore.”
“We’re still friends,” she answered softly. “You don’t need to feel guilty about that. I’ll understand if you can’t spend every minute of every day with me.”
“Of course, I want to. I miss you guys when you’re not around.”
She smiled sadly. “Maybe someday you will again.”
And then I watched her go through the front door, leaving me alone with our empty cans of beer and a bottle of whiskey. A few minutes later, Rachel came home from school. And by the end of the night, she was gone too.
***
“So, where have you been all day?” Amber asked. She’d brought a pizza and several bottles of wine down with her. The lights were off and only a few candles lit up the kitchen as we talked and listened to music.
Rachel sat next to Amber at the table. “Out,” she replied.
“With whom?”
“Just friends.” Rachel sounded vague, which irritated Amber for some reason. “How come you weren’t at practice today?”
My sister shrugged. “Someone else filled in for me.”
Amber looked at me briefly and then turned back to Rachel. “I thought we agreed that you weren’t going to lie to me.”
Rachel lowered her eyes quickly, looking ashamed. “It wasn’t really a lie,” she protested. “I mean, someone had to fill in for me. And I was already out, right? So I went over to this guy’s house and hung out with him.”
The answer seemed plausible enough, but it bothered me that Rachel had lied to Amber. It also struck me as odd, given what I knew about their friendship. I wondered if Amber suspected anything, or if the whole thing was just an excuse.
As I chewed my slice of pepperoni pizza, I considered asking Rachel but decided against it. Instead, I changed the subject. “I think we should play Truth or Dare.”
Rachel and Amber both laughed. “Why now?” Amber teased. “After we’ve been drinking all day?”
I shrugged. “Who knows? Maybe you’ll discover something embarrassing.”
That made them laugh again. “Oh, please,” Amber scoffed. “Like you’d ever tell anyone your deepest secrets.”
But neither of the girls seemed offended. Perhaps they actually believed my bluff. “Okay then,” I said, “I dare Amber to ask Rachel something personal and vice versa.”
I saw Amber glance at Rachel and then smile. They exchanged glances before Amber spoke. “Are you dating anybody?”
Rachel shook her head and laughed nervously, but Amber didn’t let her off easily.
“No, seriously,” she insisted, taking another bite of pizza. “Is there anyone you like that we know about? Or is there any chance that you might find yourself falling in love soon?”
Rachel took a moment to consider my question before answering. “There are a couple guys I like, and I guess maybe they’re into me too. But I’m not sure if things are moving fast enough for either of us.”
“You haven’t kissed any of them yet, have you? Is that why you’re waiting so long?”
Rachel shook her head quickly and looked down, unable to meet Amber’s gaze. Then she sighed and looked back up at me. “I don’t want to kiss anyone until I know it’s serious with one person.”
“Sounds like you’ve got good judgment,” Amber said, turning toward me and nodding. “Do you mind if I ask who these two people are?”
My sister’s sudden interest surprised me. I hadn’t expected her to care, but it seemed that Rachel’s answer had caught Amber’s attention more than I realized.
“Well—” Rachel paused for a second as she chewed her food and considered how best to respond to Amber.
Amber waited patiently, but I felt nervous. I wished I could see Rachel’s face, but it was impossible to know what she was thinking. Finally, Rachel cleared her throat, and I heard her clear her voice. “Both of them live in town.”
I was surprised by the answer. “Really? That makes it harder to do stuff with them.”
Rachel nodded. “Yes, exactly.”
“Does he have a car?” Amber asked casually. “Or do you walk everywhere together?”
Rachel shook her head. “He has a car. It’s parked in the parking lot behind this apartment building. You probably can’t even see it from here.”
She hesitated for a second and then added, “Sometimes he lets me ride with him.”
Amber leaned closer. “Is it a red sports car, maybe?”
Rachel looked confused. “What kind of sports car?”
“I’ve seen a bunch of guys driving those lately. They seem pretty cool.”
Rachel smiled. “Yeah, well … I suppose so. He’s had that car since I was fifteen.”
“Maybe you need to get yourself a new one,” Amber suggested. “One that you can drive wherever you want.”
Rachel grinned suddenly. “Maybe you’re right.”
Amber’s smile matched mine as we looked at Rachel. She glanced toward Amber and then back at me as she said, “And I bet she’s never told you this.”
The sudden shift in the conversation startled me, and I almost choked on my pizza. “Uh … no.”
Rachel laughed. “Then I’d say she needs a brand-new one, don’t you agree?”
I couldn’t help grinning. This was a great way to make fun of her without being too obvious. “Definitely.”
“So what does she drive now?” Amber asked, obviously curious.
I looked up at Rachel and then back at Amber. “Actually, she bought a Jeep last year.”
“A Jeep!” Amber gasped. “Wow! Do you ride around in the desert with her or something?”
Rachel rolled her eyes at the unbelievable of our story, but I just chuckled. I was getting the feeling that I might be onto something.
“No, not really,” Rachel replied. “It’s mostly city driving for us.”
“How old is she?” Amber asked, clearly trying to figure out what sort of vehicle to suggest.
Rachel shrugged. “About twenty-nine. We were born within weeks of each other and have always been close, though. Our parents died when we were both kids, and my mom’s family took her in, along with me. So she’s technically a cousin.”
“And you’re not worried about telling me because—” Amber stopped herself as if suddenly embarrassed to bring my past into our conversation.
We all sat in silence for a few seconds, and then Amber continued. “Right. And what else did you think about tonight?”
Rachel glanced across the table at me before answering. “Honestly? Nothing much. I wish I could go back to my room and watch some television, but you’ve already ruined that plan.”
Amber snorted. “That wasn’t me. If you want to get back to your show, you should probably go ahead and start walking home now. I’m going to head over to the house, but I’ll come back in half an hour.”
Rachel looked disappointed, but it seemed that the idea of leaving her comfort zone was too hard to accept. “Okay,” she muttered, pushing away her plate and standing up.
Amber waved goodbye and walked toward the front door. Rachel stood awkwardly for a minute, unsure of whether she was allowed to take her dishes with her or not.
When Amber turned around, Rachel rushed forward and threw her arms around her friend. The two girls held tight for several moments, and I was happy to see my sister smiling again. After releasing her, Rachel headed toward the kitchen to grab her purse before heading outside. I watched her leave, feeling relieved. Amber seemed to feel the same way.
“Well, that was easier than expected,” she said. “Let’s go.”
I stood up after Rachel left, followed by Amber, who locked the door behind us. I didn’t like to let anyone into my place without knowing them well enough, especially someone that young. Not that Amber was a kid. But she was still a woman, and I knew that most women would rather not have random men coming in and out of their homes.
The End