My Forever Smile
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I was still a bit stunned when I reached the ranch house. It wasn’t until after lunch that I was able to take in my surroundings and figure out how it could be possible for anyone to live like this, much less raise children.
The house itself was nothing fancy; it looked more like an old log cabin than anything else. But even though there were no walls or windows, the roof looked sturdy enough to keep off snow and rain. And judging by the number of trees surrounding it, there should have been plenty of shade during the summer months.
The main room was large but not as spacious as some of those found on the larger ranches owned by the wealthy. In fact, I would say it had only about half the space needed to accommodate a family with five children.
However, what made me pause was the amount of furniture crammed into one corner of the room. There must have been at least three dressers, two desks, two bookcases, and two tables. I also counted two rocking chairs, which were placed side-by-side on either end of the room.
“Are you all right?” Sarah asked. “You look pale.” She set her plate aside. “Perhaps we can go back inside so you can rest while I finish preparing dinner.”
No! I didn’t want to leave this place. This is where I belong. How could I explain? That I wanted to stay here because it was mine? Or maybe because I’d already decided that I loved him? No, that wouldn’t work. I couldn’t tell her that I’d never felt like this before. Never experienced such feelings of peace.
“That’s probably best,” she said quietly.
We returned to the main room. After setting down my tray on top of the table, I sat down across from Sarah. As soon as we’d settled ourselves, I took up the spoon and began scooping the chicken salad onto my plate.
“Is your appetite returning?” she asked.
I nodded. “It will get better once I start eating again.” I picked up another bite and ate it slowly, savoring the taste of it. It tasted different—not quite the same as what I remembered having eaten in town. Perhaps it was the lack of spices or perhaps the vegetables used weren’t exactly the same. Either way, I liked it.
Sarah watched me eat and seemed pleased that I was enjoying myself. She also glanced over my shoulder every few seconds to make sure that none of the boys were coming near us. Once I finished, I washed the dish in the basin and then wiped the tabletop clean using the rag hanging beside the sink.
Then I went into the other room, where I put away the clothes that were drying outside and gathered up the laundry basket. When I came back into the main room, I saw Sarah sitting on the rocker next to the window. Her hands rested lightly against each other and her eyes were closed. She wore a soft smile.
This is home. I knew it the moment I walked through the front door. Everything about it reminded me of my childhood, except for one thing: the absence of my mother.
When Sarah opened her eyes, they focused on me. “Did you know?” she whispered.
How did she know? Was it obvious? Did it show on my face? My heart raced, and suddenly I wasn’t certain if I really wanted to ask her. But I had to know. I had to hear his answer. So I swallowed hard and then spoke.
“Do you mean do I know why he left me?” I waited for a beat before adding, “Yes… I do now. He told me that day when he drove off and never turned around.”
“Why didn’t you ever return?”
I shook my head. “He told me never to come looking for him.”
“But—”
“I don’t blame him for leaving,” I quickly added. “If he hadn’t done it, I might never have met any of these people.” I paused to gather my thoughts. “And I’m grateful for their help. They’ve treated me well, and I hope I’ll be able to repay them someday.”
“Then I guess everything worked out just fine.” Sarah smiled and held out her hand. I hesitated briefly before taking it. For a moment, I thought she meant to kiss me. Instead, she pulled me close, hugged me tight, and kissed me softly on the forehead. “Welcome to our ranch.”
***
As we headed toward the barn, I noticed the horses grazing on the hillside below. Most of them looked similar to the ones I’d ridden in town, although they were slightly smaller. The one horse I recognized immediately was Blackie, who I remembered had a white star on its forehead. And there was the black horse that belonged to John, along with several others I didn’t recognize.
There was no sign of John or Jim. Where are they? I wondered. Is it possible that I won’t see them until tomorrow morning? If so, that would give us time to spend together without being interrupted.
Once inside the barn, I followed Sarah as she led me to the stall where she kept the mare. She removed the halter and bridle from the hook and handed it to me. “Here you go.”
She pointed at the tack and then reached under the hay bale to retrieve some oats. “Would you mind feeding the mare while I prepare the evening meal?”
I nodded and proceeded to take the food to the stall. A minute later, the mare started nuzzling me, and I fed her a handful of grain. I tried not to stare too long at her. It was impossible not to notice how beautiful she was. Her glossy coat shone like polished silver, and her mane was braided and hung down almost to her tail. The mare’s dark brown eyes were intelligent and curious as she examined me.
After feeding the mare, I moved over to the far end of the stall to check on the foal. I was relieved to find that he was still sound asleep and breathing steadily. That was good news since I could hardly wait to meet him. As soon as I got to work, I found it surprisingly easy to groom the mare and saddle her.
“That was quick,” said Sarah after watching me mount the mare and tie the reins to the hitching post.
I shrugged. “The mare was an excellent teacher. She showed me exactly what to do.”
“What made you want to ride?” Sarah asked as she placed a small bag of oats on the floor by the gate.
I hesitated before answering. I was surprised that I had told her anything at all. Still, I couldn’t imagine anyone asking me something more personal than this. After a brief pause, I said, “A boy rode up to our house once and offered me a dollar to sit on his horse.”
Sarah chuckled. “It seems that most boys think girls can only ride bareback.”
“Yeah,” I replied sarcastically. “Boys seem to believe that.” I paused and stared into space as I tried to remember the name of the boy who rode past our place. I finally recalled his name: Jack. He lived two miles away and came every week to play baseball.
One Saturday afternoon he stopped at our front yard. His mother called him and he rode off. But I stayed outside and watched him ride away. Then I went back home. When I saw Jack again, he looked shocked and confused when I told him I knew he had been riding. He seemed embarrassed and muttered something about how stupid it was to tell a lie.
I felt bad about lying to Jack but didn’t know how else to explain myself. What else could I say? “My father was very angry and wanted me punished, which is why I was sent to live here.” I hoped that was true enough to satisfy her. “Actually, I don’t recall seeing Jack after that day. Maybe he forgot about the incident.”
“Well, let’s hope he did forget.”
We stood side by side, waiting for the mare to finish eating. Finally, she stepped away from the feed bucket and stretched her neck out, rubbing her muzzle against mine. I patted her nose and scratched her behind her ears. I never imagined that animals could be so affectionate.
“Now, if you’re ready,” said Sarah, “we’ll head to town.”
I glanced at my watch. “It’s nearly six o’clock already.”
“Yes, well, I’m afraid you have your work cut out for you tonight. You’ll need to help with dinner, clean the kitchen, and do other chores around the ranch. There will be plenty of time for fun tomorrow.”
I nodded and we walked out of the barn. Once we arrived at the corral, Sarah directed me to remove the mare’s saddle and lead rope from the hitching rail. We left the horses there and headed toward the main house.
I noticed that Sarah was unusually quiet during the walk. Was it because she wasn’t happy to send me to work? Or maybe she just wanted to enjoy the solitude of the late summer night. Whatever her reasons, I decided not to ask her.
As we approached the porch steps leading up to the house, Sarah turned and spoke softly in a low voice. “You may have to spend a few days alone here until we get everything straightened out.”
I took a step closer to her and whispered back. “Is there a problem?”
She shook her head. “No, nothing like that. Just that Mr. DeWitt might want to interview you first.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
With that, we climbed the stairs and entered the foyer. The smell of fresh-baked bread drifted through the open doorway. It smelled heavenly. A light breeze wafted in from somewhere. For some reason, it reminded me of the cool wind blowing across the plains.
“Oh, Mrs. DeWitt,” called Sarah as she opened the door, “there’s someone here to see you.”
Mrs. DeWitt appeared from the dining room carrying a plate filled with baked ham. “Hello, Miss Abigail. Welcome to our family. Please come inside. Can I offer you something to drink or eat?”
I accepted the plate and followed Sarah into the dining room. As soon as I sat down, Mrs. DeWitt put a piece of meat in my hand.
“Thank you,” I said politely. “But no thanks are necessary. I’m sure everyone would love a slice of ham.” I gave a little cough to draw attention away from the fact that I hadn’t touched it yet. “In fact, I’d like to share some news with you.
My friend Sarah has given me permission to stay at the ranch for the next month. And since I’m staying, I thought it best to learn what kind of work needs to be done around here.”
“That’s wonderful!” exclaimed Mrs. DeWitt. She smiled and handed me another piece of meat. “I’ve been looking forward to having a girl around to help me cook, clean, and tend to the children.”
After I finished eating, Mrs. DeWitt asked if I needed any help cleaning. With that, I rose from the table and thanked them both. After taking my dishes to the sink, I returned to the dining room where I found Jack and Sarah talking quietly near the fireplace mantel.
I figured they were discussing me. I had heard all sorts of rumors about the two of them being lovers. But when I looked at them closely, neither of them seemed too concerned about my presence. So I assumed it was probably none of my business.
Once I reached the front porch, I went inside and locked the door behind me. “Jack,” I said, “what happened between you and Sarah today?”
He glanced over his shoulder. “What makes you think anything happened?”
“Because she told me you weren’t allowed to talk to me anymore.”
Jack raised an eyebrow. “Why does that bother you?”
“Because I can’t stand to be kept away from you.”
A smile lit Jack’s face. “I guess we’ll have to find ways to get past that.” He winked at me and then disappeared upstairs.
I stared at the closed door. Should I go up after him and tell him it was okay? What would happen if he got mad? Would we really break up? I didn’t know. If we did, could I ever forgive myself?
***
The rest of the evening passed quickly. I spent most of the day helping with the household chores. At least, I tried to help. Unfortunately, I was pretty useless at washing dishes, cooking, and caring for the children.
Even so, I did manage to make a fool of myself by trying to teach the kids how to play cards. They laughed at every card I dealt them. One even accused me of cheating. I couldn’t imagine why. I only played fair.
Around supper time, Mrs. DeWitt sent me outside to gather more firewood. When I returned, I set the wood beside the stove and started chopping vegetables. While cutting carrots, I saw Jack sitting on one of the stools in front of the kitchen counter. His legs dangled off the side.
We watched each other without saying a word. Neither of us knew what to say. Finally, Jack cleared his throat. “It looks like you’re enjoying yourself.”
“Yes.” I swallowed hard. “And you?”
“Well, I suppose I am. You seem to be doing just fine here.”
“I hope that doesn’t mean you won’t be coming home soon.”
For the first time, Jack’s expression turned serious. “Maybe not. Maybe this is where God wants me to be right now.”
“If that’s true, then I wish you well.”
His eyes softened. “Me too.”
Neither of us spoke again until the sun sank below the horizon and night came to the ranch house. Then, once again, I returned to the living room. By the time I reached the couch, Jack was already there, staring out the window at the setting moon.
When I took my seat next to him, I noticed that his hands lay folded in his lap. He wore an unreadable expression. In a way, I wished I understood him better than I did. That way I might know exactly what he wanted or expected from our relationship. It seemed that whenever I managed to figure something out, Jack changed the rules.
While Jack continued watching the sky, I studied him. The muscles in his arms rippled under the thin fabric of his shirt. For the second time tonight, I wondered if he’d wear that same shirt tomorrow. I hoped so. I liked the way it made me feel when I watched his chest rise and fall while sleeping.
“Sarah has decided to let you stay awhile longer,” Jack said finally. “But only because your work seems to be paying off. We haven’t received any complaints about your behavior since the incident yesterday.”
“Thank you.”
Jack nodded. “Now, don’t take this wrong, but you still need to learn some things before you leave here.”
My heart skipped a beat. “Like what?”
“How to handle people. How to deal with their problems. And how to keep the peace.”
That wasn’t good news. “What kind of trouble are we talking about?”
“People will always try to stir up trouble. Some will do it with words, and others will use actions. A few may even resort to violence. Don’t worry; no one’s going to hurt you unless they intend to kill. But you should prepare yourself anyway.”
“Okay, but I’m sure I’ll survive.”
Jack gave me a half grin. “You will, but I want you to remember everything I’ve taught you. Everything.”
After I finished my dinner, I helped Jack clean up the kitchen. Once we were done, we sat down at the table together. With nothing else to occupy my mind, I found myself wondering how Jack had ended up as a sheriff.
“Do you miss being a deputy?” I asked. “Or is this all you ever wanted?”
He smiled. “Deputy? No, never.” He shook his head. “I’ve been wanting to become a lawman since I was fifteen years old.”
“Why?” I looked puzzled.
“Because I grew up around criminals. My father used to rob stagecoaches.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
I glanced away. I thought maybe I heard a distant echo of laughter in my memory. Had that been Jack’s voice? Or someone else’s? Was I imagining things?
“Didn’t you ever get angry at him?” I blurted out. “Don’t you think that robbing those coaches was wrong?”
“Of course. But what could I do? There was no one left to teach me about responsibility. All I knew was that my father didn’t love me. So instead of trying to change him, I decided to find someone who would.”
The idea sounded strange. Yet I couldn’t argue with what Jack had said. Not after I learned how much pain his childhood had caused him. I tried to imagine growing up with an alcoholic father. Could I have stayed sane? Would I have been able to stand by and watch while my dad robbed people for money? Probably not. I’d probably have run away too.
Jack paused, then sighed. “I guess I should have known I wouldn’t be able to stop my father. Even if I did catch him stealing, the judge would probably let him go free because he had no criminal record. He was too important to the town to punish harshly.”
“So why did you decide to join the sheriff’s department?”
Jack chuckled. “Well, I figured that if anyone could arrest my father, it would be a lawman. But, believe it or not, the sheriff refused to hire me.”
“Refused to hire you? Why?”
“It seems that my father had told everyone in town that I was a thief just like him. The judge also felt sorry for me because I lost both parents within three months of each other. If he hadn’t, I wouldn’t have gotten past the interview stage.”
I frowned. “And yet, somehow, you became a sheriff.”
“Yes.” He laughed softly. “All because I fell in love with a beautiful woman. Sarah. She saw through my reputation and hired me despite the fact that she had no reason to trust me.”
I reached over and placed my hand on top of his. His fingers curled around mine. “She must really care for you.”
“More than anything.”
His tone warmed my heart. “Does that mean you’re going to marry her someday?”
“Maybe.”
For once I wished he’d answer more questions. “If so, I hope you’ll consider me when you ask for her hand.”
Jack grinned. “Oh, there won’t be a wedding for a long time, honey.”
“Is that so?” I turned toward him, feeling warm inside. “Then I’ll make sure you marry soon.”
The End