Cross Her Heart
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“Hey, babe.” It was a greeting, not an invitation. The smile he gave me wasn’t for my benefit; it was for the people watching us as I stood by his side. He was the most popular member of the New York Devils hockey team, and I knew that everyone wanted to see him happy.
But right now all they saw were the bruises on his face and the way he was holding back from looking at them. I could understand why they might think we weren’t so happy either.
I took his hand in mine, wanting to be the one who showed those people that we were fine. That our relationship had nothing to do with what happened last night. And yet I still felt awkward as I looked up into the crowd’s faces, waiting to see how many would stare at us and whether or not anyone would point out his injuries.
“Are you okay?” My voice was soft, even though my hands shook as I tried to keep myself steady.
His head jerked toward me, and he smiled slightly before his eyes returned to the group watching us. His lips curved upward as he leaned closer to whisper in a loud enough voice for only me to hear, “You’re just worried about me.” Then he kissed me once more on the cheek and whispered, “Don’t worry about it, baby. It’s fine.”
He pulled away, leaving me to wonder if there was anything that didn’t make me feel like he thought I was a child.
We were supposed to have been at the arena for several hours already but, when I arrived, the coach told me that he’d left without saying where we were going. I knew then that something was wrong because we were playing tonight and he usually never went anywhere during practice unless it was unavoidable.
After I waited for a few minutes by the entrance, I walked inside to try and find him and found the locker rooms empty. No one had seen him since yesterday morning.
After asking around and finding that the other guys hadn’t been called to go somewhere else, I finally went outside and ran through the cold rain and wind, heading straight toward the parking lot, hoping that I could run faster than a police car.
When I got to his truck, I noticed that a cop had turned on his lights, but the engine was warm. It was obvious someone was trying to hide their presence in the truck, and I couldn’t help wondering which of us it might be. Was it possible that somebody had decided to hurt him? Or worse, did they want to kill him and throw him over here like he was no longer needed? I couldn’t stop shaking.
As soon as the doors opened, I jumped in and immediately started yelling at him, “Where are you going?!”
My voice echoed off the walls and made me realize that maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. If he was driving fast enough to get out of the city and out of reach, there was no telling where he’d end up.
“Stop! Stop!” I screamed again. “Please tell me where you’re going.”
There was no answer as I sat behind him, watching as the truck lurched forward.
“Dammit, Eric … don’t you dare fucking leave me alone again, please …”
When he drove down the road, I reached across his shoulders and grabbed his wrists.
“What do you mean, you’ve done it?” His knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel too tight and his jaw was clenched. His body was tense, and I could tell he wouldn’t say another word until we got wherever he was taking me.
I looked out the window as the truck bounced over the potholes in the road, but it wasn’t long before I realized he was heading north and into the country. “Is there some kind of problem at home?” I asked nervously.
He grunted as he shifted gears, trying to get us to move faster. “Yes, there is,” he snapped.
The truck stopped, and I jumped out before he could turn on the lights. I stood on the shoulder of the dark highway and watched as he backed down onto the road, and then he turned left, continuing in the same direction as before. There was nowhere to go but further into the woods. He was trying to lose me.
A police cruiser came into view and I ran toward him and held up my hands, waving for his attention. “Hey, Officer.”
He slammed his foot against the gas, causing the cruiser to skid to a halt, and the back tires spun as they hit the muddy ground, throwing up rocks and mud. A cloud of dust and leaves rose into the air.
Eric turned to face me. “Do you know what I’ve done?”
The officer’s eyes widened when he saw Eric’s injuries. He stepped out of the patrol car. “Whoa.”
“What happened?” The officer approached slowly, but when I heard Eric yell at him, I turned around.
“Officer, please listen to her. Just leave me the fuck alone, okay?”
When he reached for my arm, I slapped it away. “You hurt him, Eric! You hurt your own son! How can you not see it, man? Why would you put him through this shit?” My hands began to shake.
Eric’s eyes widened when I spoke his name.
The officer took his hand away. “Listen, son, you don’t need to—”
“Don’t call me, ‘son’,” Eric interrupted him. “And who says I’m doing this to myself?”
With my heart pounding inside my chest, I felt my fingers start to tremble, but I refused to show it. “If you weren’t drinking so much, we wouldn’t be here having this conversation.”
I turned toward him, unable to contain the tears streaming down my cheeks. I had to force them back because it was too easy to let everything come pouring out right now, and the last thing I wanted was for him to think that he’d hurt me. I’d already given him more than enough ammunition.
But even if I was crying, or scared, or upset—even if I had lost control … none of those things meant anything to him.
“Look, Eric. We have a serious problem here.”
His shoulders dropped and he lowered himself onto the seat, putting his head in his hands. “No … no, you don’t understand.”
“Are you going to hurt yourself?” I asked as I wiped my nose with the back of my hand and tried desperately to pull myself together.
“How did you find me?” He didn’t look up. “Did I forget to lock up, or what?”
I shook my head quickly. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you since yesterday night.”
“Yesterday fucking night?”
“Well, we knew it was pretty late when we found out you’d left. And we hadn’t seen any sign of you.” I paused for a moment, wondering how to tell him about the letter. After all, this wasn’t a conversation I’d ever expected to have, but something told me it was time for me to tell him exactly what I’d discovered. “It’s just that someone sent us a letter …”
I watched him carefully as he sat there and stared out the window. “Someone?”
I pulled the envelope out of my pocket. “Just read it and then we’ll talk.”
For a while, he said nothing and only breathed heavily into his hands. I could tell he was angry and confused.
Finally, he turned toward me and opened the envelope gingerly like it might explode. He unfolded the paper in his fingers and read:
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Johnson,
Your son has been missing for several days now. Please help us by reporting his disappearance immediately. This is not an idle request or joke—there are lives at stake here, lives that you’re responsible for protecting, and that’s why I’ve come personally to ask you this favor. Do what is right and report your son as soon as possible. Thank you for your time.
***
After reading it a few times, he tossed the letter aside and closed his eyes tightly. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees.
“Is your dad still in jail?” I asked, but he ignored me.
Instead, he looked up at me. “Why the hell does everyone keep telling me to go home?” His voice cracked as he repeated those words, and he buried his head in his hands again.
“Because, Eric, you’re not well!” It came out too harshly; I forced myself to take a breath before speaking again. “You’re not okay, and it’s affecting other people in ways you haven’t even realized yet.”
He didn’t move at first, but finally, his head lifted from his arms. When his blue eyes met mine, they were dull and lifeless, filled with pain.
“How can I get better if you won’t let me go home? What do you want from me, Sami? Because I swear, this is as far as I can go with all of this. I am done, but you know I’d rather die than leave you. Can’t you feel it? Can’t you see it in my eyes?”
Tears started spilling over and I quickly wiped them off as I took another step toward him. I couldn’t believe he was saying this. But I also understood him perfectly well. In fact, it was a miracle he didn’t have a nervous breakdown every single day.
I stood there staring at him for a long time, but then he grabbed the side of my face and kissed me hard on the mouth. I pushed him back a bit, but then he gripped my hands and pinned them against the wall as he continued kissing me harder. The heat was intense, and I wanted him to stop, but I hated myself for it because of the way he made me feel. Like we weren’t so different after all.
The passion that had always burned between us was back, and it seemed like it would never end. It was as though our minds were connected, as though we shared thoughts with one another without words ever needing to cross. I was sure he needed me and I was sure he loved me … but neither of us wanted to say it aloud.
My heart was racing and I felt dizzy when he finally lifted his head and whispered into my ear.
“… love you forever, Sami,” he murmured as he pressed his forehead to mine. “Love you until I can’t breathe.”
***
Eric looked up at me and grinned as he stretched out his legs and laid back on the couch. I sat down beside him and we watched TV as though everything was normal, as though we’d never broken up. As though, maybe we’d actually forgotten that we were broken up … which seemed impossible because it had happened so quickly, like lightning striking.
But we’d gone from being inseparable lovers to not speaking at all in such a short amount of time that it almost didn’t seem real. But now things were different. Everything was different and I wondered if he’d ever truly understand that this really wasn’t a game to me anymore.
As I studied him, I realized he was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. From the way, his skin glistened with sweat in the sunlight streaming through the windows, to the way he held his head high despite the bruises and cuts that covered him.
There was so much power inside him, just like I had seen in the vampires and demons I’d fought over the years, but Eric’s was purer than any other. He’d given himself away to protect me countless times, sacrificing his own future and happiness, even though I knew he didn’t mean to. He’d risked everything in hopes of protecting my future.
I couldn’t imagine life without him, not now that I’d gotten to experience something so special for the very first time. And although I thought we would have no problem moving on from whatever had driven us apart—whether it was his father or something else entirely, there was no denying that what we shared together was rare, powerful, and worth fighting for.
We were a team.
When I got up and walked to the kitchen to grab some food, Eric grabbed my hand and pulled me back toward the living room where we sat next to each other on the couch. We ate in silence for a while, but then he reached across the space between us and took both of my hands in his. “It feels strange, doesn’t it? Being here again?”
I nodded silently and kept stealing glances at him. I wanted to ask him about everything, but I was afraid of getting in trouble with our dad. “Yeah, I don’t think we should be here. Dad will find out.”
“He’ll probably just figure out we’ve been having a sleepover in my old bedroom instead of going through our stuff,” Eric laughed. “But seriously, Sami … I hate that I’m making you do this, but it’s not permanent. You’re right, Dad would be furious, but we won’t stay long. And besides, it’s too damn hot outside.”
“What if we run into your father? Do you really think he’ll forgive us for breaking up with him?”
His dark brows rose in surprise. “You broke up with me? No, I’m pretty sure we broke up before you left. Why would I need to apologize for anything? I told him you couldn’t come home anymore.”
“I’m not so sure … maybe because I am still a human and you are …”
Eric snorted. “If I get killed by one of these damn monsters because I decided to help you out, then that’ll be the reason I was murdered.”
I could hardly believe what I was hearing. “Do you know how crazy you sound right now? I can barely keep up with you, and I thought you were supposed to be the experienced one in all of this.”
“Just because I know more than you, doesn’t mean I understand any of this,” he grumbled. “This is nothing like my world. It’s so messed up and weird and I wish I could go back.”
I tried to calm the panic rising within me. “You can’t. We can’t, and we’ll both be punished if we try. The only way to fix things is for you to return to my world, and the sooner the better. So let’s just pretend we’re having a slumber party with a couple of friends, okay?”
“Okay,” he replied in an exasperated tone. Then he glanced at me and smiled. “How did we end up like this?”
“I can’t remember exactly. But I do remember thinking that I needed to take care of myself, or I wouldn’t survive.”
“Same here,” he muttered.
And that’s when I remembered. When the police officers had taken me to jail, Eric had come after them. But the moment they started firing on us, Eric had dived for cover behind me and protected me by shielding me from their bullets.
If it hadn’t been for the bullet that struck him in the shoulder, it might have killed us both instantly. And even though he’d managed to fight off the men who’d shot at us, he had been badly hurt, suffering a broken wrist, two punctured lungs, a dislocated collarbone, and three fractured ribs as well.
After the attack, I’d been carried away on a stretcher and had gone unconscious while the paramedics worked to save his life.
The next thing I remembered was being carried into another ambulance where Eric lay on a gurney in front of me, his face bruised and bloodied from where he’d suffered multiple injuries. The doctors and nurses had worked quickly to stabilize him, stitching his torn flesh, cleaning out his wounds, and giving him oxygen to clear his lungs of blood and infection.
That’s why they rushed us into intensive care at the hospital in Atlanta. It wasn’t until Eric finally came around that I realized that he must have been injured during the fight. My heart had soared when he woke up and saw me lying beside him.
He smiled weakly at first, and I felt like he’d lost weight because the skin beneath his cheekbones was sunken in. His eyes were still closed tightly, but there were tears falling down his cheeks. He seemed to be holding on to consciousness, but he didn’t open his mouth to speak.
After staring at him for a minute, I reached out and brushed my fingertips over his forehead, trying to offer comfort. Then, after taking a deep breath, he finally said, “Sam?”
He’d never called me by my name before. It sent a shiver through me, but when I spoke softly, saying that I was okay, he looked at me and smiled again.
“Don’t worry about me,” he whispered. “You should concentrate on getting yourself healed.”
My heart ached as I stared at him. How could we continue our relationship knowing that something had happened between us? We had no idea how much time had passed since we’d become bonded.
There was also a chance that my healing abilities wouldn’t work on him, and he could be in pain for days and weeks until he was able to heal naturally. Or maybe he could die of infection or some other complication before we got the chance to see each other again.
There was a possibility that he’d died because I wasn’t there to protect him … I didn’t want to believe that, but I couldn’t shake the fear.
And then a small, dark cloud drifted across his features, and he looked so lost and alone that I wanted to pull him back in my arms, hug him tightly, and tell him everything was going to be alright.
But I knew it wouldn’t help. We were too far apart from one another, and the more distance we put between us, the greater chance that I would lose him. If we weren’t careful, we risked losing ourselves completely, not just our lives.
I pulled back from him, feeling the sadness in his gaze turn my stomach inside out. “Let’s get you home,” I told him gently.
Eric nodded, and then a doctor walked in. She introduced herself as Dr. Kale, and she asked if Eric could hear her.
I stepped aside so that the doctors could examine him, leaving me sitting alone in an empty room. I watched as they removed his IV and examined the bruises and cuts on his arm. They cleaned and stitched the worst of his wounds, and I tried not to watch as they moved their fingers along his flesh.
Eventually, they gave me permission to go home and let him rest while he recovered. I thanked them for their hard work and hurried away, afraid that Eric might wake up and see me crying.
Once outside, I sat down on a bench beside the parking garage and stared at the sky as darkness fell over the city. My heart was breaking, and I had no idea what I was supposed to do now. All I knew was that I had to find him.
I had to keep him alive and make sure nothing happened to him anymore. I couldn’t stand the thought of anything happening to Eric, and when I looked at my palms, all I saw were black spots.
It was then that I understood why Eric had been so worried about me. I was a freak. A monster with supernatural powers, which meant that if he found out what I really was …
What would happen then? Would he be scared of me? Disgusted? Maybe even hate me? Did he think I was the same way he was? That I hated humans and only wanted to hurt them the way I’d been abused as a child? I couldn’t allow myself to feel the guilt and shame that threatened to consume me over my past.
The End